When You Date Your Best Friend
Should You Date Your Best Friend?
29 Jul Starting a relationship with someone you already trust, have things in common with, and care about can create a solid bond for the long haul, but there On the other hand, your super-hot friend may not be the best person for the long-term if they have a long streak of sleeping with girls and never calling. The pros, the cons, and the realities of dating your friend. They say the best relationships start off as friendships, but what they don't mention is how tricky it can be to go from friend zone to couple status. (Just watch “Pretty Woman” if you need a refresh on what a minefield that transition can be.) If you're interested in dating your friend, chances are you probably value that.
Here is some expert advice for navigating those dangerous waters of how to date your best friend. Are you looking for a quick fix?
Are you tired of dating? Save your needs-based dating for someone less permanent, but if you wish to let your feelings be known, then keep reading Clearly asking them out and consistently doing so will wake them up to the reality that this is more than just casual buddy behavior.
Even with consistency, there will likely come a time where you have to verbalize your interest.
You have to make sure that becoming a couple really is what you both want; once this decision is made there is no turning back. I knew his passions and fears and appreciated his support through good and bad times, and over time he had become one of my best guy friends. Next time, should I decide the risk is worth it again, I may find that here your best friend can be the most rewarding relationship yet. No one is ever good enough for them.
Getting physical will blow up your relationship—positively or negatively—so be conscientious about introducing it to your friendship. Going further will complicate everything and likely kill your friendship. Friends are great, but lasting love is what life is about. If it all goes sour, you can make more friends.
How is dating a friend different?
If you really want to know what this can be, you have to put yourself out there and go for it. Relax, and remember the factors that make the two of you friends in the first place. In the movie When Harry Met Sally, their friendship evolved to weirdness because they forgot the things that made them friends.
They were able to rebuild towards love once the safety of their friendship was back in tact. And that still might be the case for the other person, so leave room for that possibility.
I know you want to bat around the idea with your other friends, but if they are good friends with your bestie, introducing this new relationship element may complicate things. That lack of immediate validation may make you feel insecure and want to retreat. Yo-yoing from friend to interested to friend will confuse the other person, so be strong, firm, and secure in your feelings.
Give them the time they need to know how they feel about you. Not pursuing things can lead to years of wishing and wasting your time. So get on with it!
The Pros and Cons of Dating Your Best Friend
Love based on friendship is the stuff true love is made of. By being clear with your intentions, careful with your physical advances, and practicing communication, your friendship may have a chance at blossoming into something deeper.
Michelle Barnum Smith is a dating coach Michelle now teaches other sing Skip to main content.
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